A Month of Prayer, Pilgrimage and Ceremony for the Good of All
Praying for the strength, courage, wisdom, and compassion to serve the good of all.
Written: February 28, 2023
You might think it would eventually get easier to describe the ineffable experiences of the spiritual path; yet if anything they only seem to get more mysterious and elusive. Every time I attempt to describe the experiences and shifts that occurred during my month of prayer, pilgrimage and ceremony in Peru I immediately realize the futility. In fact the experiences have seemed somewhat diminished by the mere attempt to put them into words. Yet it is the duty of the initiated to attempt to describe the indescribable, give word to the wordless, and to lure the infinite down into a finite and comprehensible form. That is the work of the Chacaruna - impossible though it may be.
This was the second time I've made the Huachuma Pilgrimage in Peru with don Martin, and it is hard to imagine a more profound spiritual practice or better teacher. I wasn't quite sure how this trip might differ from the first. What I discovered is that each sacred site is a multidimensional portal with infinite layers of information, and that I am only beginning to scratch the surface of what each has to teach me.
As a student of the medicine this pilgrimage has become my classroom and most potent teacher. Don Howard dedicated over 20 years of his life to bringing people on this journey and I see why. It truly is a journey through time. Past, present, and future all collapse into the eternal now allowing us to recover ancient wisdom from the past and receive oracular visions of the future. Everything is present to be observed, experienced, and learned from. All while attuning to the vibration of heaven on Earth while in a human body in a completely lucid super conscious state.
A few years ago I never would have imagined part of my work would be making these pilgrimages to Peru. Yet by some quirk of fate this is the work that is mine to do, and I am deeply honored to be doing it.
When talking about the profound and transformative experience of connecting with the Lanzón at the center of the Chavin Temple during our Chavin Ceremony, my friend referred to the experience as "stumbling into my own spiritual awakening." After a bit of laughter we all agreed we felt pretty much the same way. Our present level of consciousness simply cannot comprehend the level beyond it. We all dwell in the darkness of our limited perspective with only a flicker of awareness to light our way.
Don Martin says that in ancient Chavin only a select few ever got to meet the Lanzón face to face. It was an honor to be chosen, and to be deemed worthy you had to overcome many trials. Those who completed the trials and met the Lanzón were subsequently regarded as leaders because the Lanzón bestowed the wisdom to lead.
The Lanzón has been seated in its current location in the Chavin Temple for 3,000 years, and is the only pre-Columbian God in the Americas seated in its original location. Each time I have communed with that being I have received a huge download that is more than my mind can comprehend. As a multidimensional antenna for infinite love, wisdom, and bliss the Lanzón is still bestowing wisdom. Whether those of us who have had the honor of communing with it become leaders will depend on whether we step forward and are able to withstand the trials of leadership.
During my month of medicine work I prayed for the strength, courage, wisdom, and compassion to do what is being asked of me in service to the good of all. An unfortunate truth is that light attracts darkness, and our endeavors to serve the light are often greeted with an equal challenge from the dark. Because the "darkness" is nothing other than our own unconscious and unhealed nature - the brighter the light the more illuminated it becomes.
Medicine work has a profound capacity to serve the light. That is why I'm dedicating my life to it. However, it can quickly generate a beacon of light that is so blinding and illuminating that the container around it begins to buckle. Peoples' shadows arise and get amplified. Egos become an exaggerated caricature of themselves. Slight grievances that would ordinarily be brushed off become all consuming obsessions.
It takes a lot of fortitude, clarity, humility, and self awareness to be an effective leader in this space. Being a leader of transformational work requires us to be relentlessly dedicated to our own transformation. We have to be willing to continue stepping forward toward the light even when it hurts and is blinding, remain true to the path even when those around us falter, and be humble enough to recognize when we have lost our way.
When Parker and I walked this path together the burden was shared. With his passing it has become heavier and the path more lonely. Which is requiring me to expand my capacity and heal the parts of myself that have often caused me to be a reluctant leader.
According to my friend Brad who performed a Daoist reading for me (highly recommended!) on the road to Chavin, leadership is my life theme - with vacancies in passion, expression, and vision. So while I've often served in leadership roles, I've really only ever been a dispassionate administrator of the collective will with few preferences about how things might turn out.
This has made me an adequate leader of the status quo - but not of transformation. More than anything transformational leadership requires vision and passion. It is only when vision and passion come together and are clearly expressed that we are able to help shepherd in something that has never been before. Because without visionary leadership we are doomed to repeat the mistakes of the past, and become slaves to history's dumb implacable inertia.
For my part I'm no longer willing to be a slave to the past, or to my own unconscious nature. So I'm working on filling my vacancies, and this work has become the vehicle of my evolution. It is the hottest fire I can imagine, and I'm honored to stand in its blaze for the good of all.
These thoughts were with me during the despatcho at our final ceremony at Heaven's Gate. My prayer was for what I needed in order to be who I need to be to serve the good of all. As I looked down at the hole don Martin dug for our offering I saw the above picture of Parker and don Howard smiling up at me. I couldn't help but smile and cry a little at seeing their faces. None of us ever really walk this path alone. We are forever surrounded by brothers, sisters, teachers, and allies both visible and unseen. Yet somehow we must find the will and faith within us to keep walking the path, while allowing ourselves to be supported and guided along the way. Like all of us, I'm blessed to have these two guardian angels watching out for me from the other side.
Infinite Love,
Zachary